The world through my distorted lens... a distorted world through my lens.

Happy Fathers day

Fathers are the pillars of our families, and in a broader view, society. As the breadwinners by default, they act as the financier-in-chief of the family. Providing enough funds needed to school the kids, feed, clothe and shelter the family. Notwithstanding the state of the economy. In most cases, he is the first to leave the house for work and the last to come back,  not as a hobby, but a means by which he meets his primary fatherly responsibilities, which is providing the financial needs of the family.

But aside acting as the family's ATM,  fathers have over time, been the chief disciplinarian in most families. They instill morality and improve upon the ethics of the children. They take no bullshit at all. When you give them a bullshit, you get a bull's hit. Yes, they use the cane. But the reason in retrospect is more often than not, justified.

When they err, kids often find a way to hack into the heart of their mothers and go scot-free. But a father's heart is fortified with firewalls, you can't hack into it, play with their emotions and get around a crime unpunished. Even the mothers are well aware of this, sometimes when the child goes "out of gear", they threaten to report that child to the father. "Chiboy, so you don't want to wash your clothes, don't worry  your daddy will soon be back..." After that, as if under spell, Chiboy goes to wash his clothes pronto.

When you walk up to a kid in the street and try to hoodwink him/her into doing something wrong, you feel the father's discipline at play when s/he declines and responds:
"No, my dad will be mad at me"
Or when you ask a kid from the street I grew up in, the response is identical:
"No o, my Papa go shout"

The fear of the Father comes outrightly into play. It has subconsciously installed moral uprightness in the minds of such kid, even when eyes are not watching.

In a family where the father is up to par, a child dares not leave the house without permission and come back late at night. If by chance or maybe by sheer adventure the child leaves the house without permission, and fate hooks up with him in the form of traffic jam or something, and he or she is still late outside, the fear of the father will continue to taunt him or her from wherever, to the door of their apartment.

If you find a wayward kid in the street, look at the society of such kid but before then, look into the family and more specifically, the father.

The father's duty cannot be overemphasized, despite their  being strict and authoritative, they also find a balance by being affectionate and protective. It is not an easy role if you ask me.

Happy father's day to my dad and all the fathers out there.
Dads are amazing.
God bless my dad.

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Here Today Gone Tomorrow

Just this morning, we woke up to the news of the demise of Stephen Okechukwu Keshi. Yes, it happened. Unexpected and shocking as it might be. The nation's cup winner as a player and a coach is no more. He's gone.

Who do we hold accountable?
Is this the pact we signed up with life? Here today and gone tomorrow? Forever?

Incidents like this usually triggers off questions deep inside our minds.
Questions that paralyzes my thought.
Questions about Whys.
Why life?
Why death?
Why do bad things happen to good people?
Why do people live today and flourish, only to die tomorrow and be forgotten?
Why this? Why that?

Someone said, "people die only after they have fulfilled their destinies, or purposes in life"
I ask, what about the children that die young. They as well have fulfilled their destinies huh?  Or the infants that die few minutes after birth, perhaps their sole purpose or destiny in life was to cry.

Some months back, I lost a friend to a fire incident. This friend of mine (may his soul rest in peace) was a student of Medicine, and was about rounding off before the tragic incident. Was he not supposed to be a "destined" medical doctor, after passing through primary and secondary school, scaling through JAMB and post UTME and making painstaking efforts to meet the requirements in order to remain a student of Medicine?

Sadly, there are no answers to the many questions life throws at us, and for the reverence and fear we have, we cannot question the Almighty. But do we have questions? Yes, we sure do.  Even when we pretend not to, or are afraid to ask, the questions resides deep in our curious minds, and reoccur often only to be silenced.

King Solomon,  the wisest king in the Bible was faced with similar same life questions. Of which he concluded, "life is useless"  and in a different verse he wrote, "Here is what I have found out: the best thing we can do is eat and drink and enjoy what we have worked for during the short life that God has given us; this is our fate."

Indeed, it is truly a short life. No matter how long you live, you would be dead much longer. So, longevity alone doesn't mean we have led a meaningful life. Neither does the wealth we amass nor the accolades we are ascribed. The meaning of life is the meaning we give it. The smiles we put on the faces of each other, the happiness, the contentment, the reason to live through the uncertainties of life and hope.

We are here today, but we won't always be here. Someday we'll go, maybe tomorrow, maybe next. This is not the time when you say "fire" or "I reject it" or "it is not my portion". It is not a wise thing to say, well, neither is asking "unanswerable questions". It is best we do the good we can today, to do it now and every limited time the opportunity arises.

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